Long overdue:

It's been a real long time since I've painted something.

Words are from this song.

Invincible Summer

An illustration I made for Ginger.

At first I was kind of stumped on what to draw for her. I was really excited to do it, but the more I thought about it, the more I felt like this illustration was something kind of personal - more than I initially thought it would be. To be too deep and over-analytical - this illustration would be a part of me that would be on her wall and she would look at it everyday until she decided it sucked and take it down. That kind of weirded me out and I began to put a nonsensical and unnecessary pressure on myself and went into a little lull of not knowing what to do.

Ginger and I talked about what she wanted, and she kept it quite open, to think of it as a sort of hello from me to her.

And so - Hello Ginger. This is for you and I hope you like it.

And for everyone else - this is such a good quote (from Albert Camus!) and is always something nice to remember.

Cat's Cradle

Cat's cradle explorations:

Text from this: http://blog.pictorymag.com/post/10606633545/the-night-was-young-and-so-was-i-the-lights-were

a reminder:

It's always hard to remember that the end of something is the start of an opportunity. And that it's from there where you see what you're made of and that discomfort will make you something more if you try.

Thanks summer, twas swell. Hello fall, hope you're glad to see me.

the only one.

I thought this was a line from the Black Keys song (The Only One). Turns out I heard and remembered it slightly wrong (it goes, "Mystery is what this is to me"). I like my version better though. MORE ROMANTIC.

loved it more than anything, loved everything more than anything.

for everyone and anyone on february 14:

It was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight. -Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita.

mine to use and mine to lose.

Mike Mills has a new movie coming out:

Charming. A dog that gets subtitles!
Some of you may know Mike Mills because of this image:

Others of you may know him because of this other movie he did (which I had only recently found out, thanks Sean), Thumbsucker:

I really wanted to like that movie, but I was just really underwhelmed. Maybe Keanu Reeves (who really oddly stood out to me in the movie) threw me off? Because I feel like that was kind of sort of around his Matrix days and I didn't realize that Keanu Reeves is this weird robotic actor that needs a deeper sense of appreciation that I clearly didn't have at the age of seventeen. It was just a really quiet movie, and I should probably see it again, I've...become more perceptive to quietness. (haha).

Anyways though, what I really want to say about Mike Mills is this, he had this book that he put out through Nieves, Fireworks. The explanation he had for this book was just one of the nicest things I had read in a long time:

Some things that may or may not relate to these drawings: A professional suggested I take anti-depressants. I declined. About the same time I started drawing fireworks. I didn’t know what they meant or why I was drawing them. I was confused and embarrassed by this lack of meaning, but they kept coming. I could draw them no matter how I felt. I read that fireworks were first used in China in the 12th century to scare away negative spirits. I envied a world that not only recognized spirits, but scared the negative ones away with small man made explosions.

So, so nice.

And he ends by saying:

I felt a connection between the Chinese fireworks and the placebo effect, and some relief in all the things we don’t understand. At some point the fireworks grew more and more abstract, and messy, and complicated, and I became if not content then at least willing to make things that didn’t have any apparent meaning.

And so:



Last time I drew fireworks was in my first year drawing class at Emily Carr. We had to draw a night scene and I drew people watching fireworks. The teacher said that the idea was nice, but fireworks actually look very clean, and mine were too messy. I didn't really take it to heart. And it was in the class that I didn't take much of his criticism to heart as I did with my previous drawing teacher. And then drawing didn't seem like such a terrifying struggle to impress someone.

But a way to feel better.

away, away, away.

I need to remember to bring my camera around with me more.

And FYI:

Thanks Jane.

New American Felines

So this show was the bane of my existence on and off this whole week:

It's being put on by the boys at Straw, and the show is drawings of felines. New ones. American ones. It was pretty open-ended for what the drawings should be and all that, and it was exciting and seemed like fun, but when it came time to actually draw something, I was completely stuck.

Andy drew one of the best cats known to man, Maru. Maru rules. And this drawing rules. Has that manga feeling to it which is totally fitting since Maru is the cutest Japanese cat alive.

I drew a cat that night that Andy drew Maru and it was met with some pretty subpar looks. I knew my drawing was pretty whatever too and that I should do something else. I had no idea what to do, but I remember having one kind of silly idea where a bunny has cat ears, and having no other interesting thing to do, I did it.

And jeeze, it's so cute. A BUNNY WITH CAT EARS! I am dying.

I used to have a loped ear bunny, it went through a variety of names, BB (people asked me if I named it after a competitor on Survivor, hrm no, it's a cute name), Lucky, Obi Wan Kenobi (I was in love with him at the time), and then finally just...Bunny. When the bunny was younger it would hump the large beanie baby frog that my brother owned. I don't know why it was so attracted to it, but he would always go to it.

Anyways, go to the show if you're in Calgary, should be cute/nice/fun.

#18

March so far:

Went to this place, Simply French (at Alma and W.10th) with Maggie. It was nice, you should go. 

Prints I have made and that are available in ma store.  The whole time I was making these prints, it was like, man what am I doing. I had these x's on a page that looked terrible, or a flower that looked like it was done in a junior high art class and I just couldn't make myself patient enough to just finish the thing before making such harsh judgements. I needed immediate satisfaction for every second of the process (and that never really happens, as I so often forget) and it took a lot to keep pushing myself and convincing myself that what I was doing wasn't completely dumb and to keep going. And here we are. And I'm pretty glad we're here.

spidey.

Hello February.

bread, pizza, fortune cookies, and volcanoes.

BEHOLD:

My first real loaf of homemade bread. As you can see I am very excited and entertained about how I am documenting this moment in photobooth.

I've always been scared to bake bread, the whole kneading, letting it rise thing was just too daunting, time consuming, and even though it's a basic skill that I think everyone should have (And they probably do possess, but seldom try) it's just way more convenient to buy it. But it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought (as with everything in life) and I'll probably do it again in like a year or something. The recipe I used is from this book, which I go to for a lot of my eating needs.

Also! First ever attempt at making no-knead pizza dough. You may notice my laziness when it comes to making bread like things, if there is an easy way, I will take that way. Again, I was scared to make this pizza dough because I had read that it's not as easy as it sounds and the thought of attempting something and possibly failing and having no dinner totally scared me off. Even though whenever I read about how people are scared to work with certain ingredients, I think, pusssyyy, but then I am a bigger pussy, and one of my New Years resolutions: not be a pussy. So I made this pizza and it worked out well and I am happy I did. Pays to not be a pussy.

The most asian thing I've ever done. When Josh was here he talked about wanting to make fortune cookies and he was kind of kidding and when I said we should do it for real, he said he only thought of it because it was ridiculous and probably impossible to make. I didn't think it was impossible and I wanted to prove that to him. So this is hahha...the result. They look more like teeth cookies, WISDOM TEETH COOKIES! And I like how very homemade it looks, they make me laugh each time I look at them, and I was kind of laughing to myself while I was making them as well...maybe that's why they look all misshapen. Anyways, the recipe is from Martha Stewart, nothing that woman can't teach you.

A serious photo of the teeth cookies.

Up close! ahahahahah. Oh gosh.

There are actual fortunes inside the cookies (set in Akkurat and typewritten lucky numbers on the back!), ones that were submitted to Josh, and if you have a desire to send in some fortunes, send them to him at: thestrawbooks@gmail.com. My favorite ones are, "Even War Won Tons want peace", "CAUTION: May contain traces of paper", "Help! I am being held prisoner in a Chinese bakery", and "luck is its own reward."

I felt like I've made a lot of weird/novel things in the past few days, or have documented in a weird/novel way, so here is something kinda serious that I've made that's been in my head for a long while. I've always been fascinated by the word "Volcanoes", it stemmed from the Feist song, "Past in Present" when she sings a bit about volcanoes, and I just loved that tension and explosion and I remember just putting the word on photos and it just made the image seem so much more heavier, like it was on the brink of something, like when the weather is threatening to rain but you weren't sure if it will.

Could go either way.

Whew.

rudderless:

Been thinking about this word a lot these days.

In other news, 3D seems to be a super big thing right now (especially in my twitter feed!!!). BUT YO! Up in 3D was like whatever (the effects, the movie itself was awesome!) I guess I really need to see Avatar in 3D.

Anywayyyyssss.

Boulder/Vancouver Life

Tobias thinks we're getting close with getting the right exposure times for screenprinting. I sure don't feel it yet, but I hope we are.

The successful result of my first visit to Army and Navy. Now my neighbor shouldn't be complaining about hearing me walk around in my apartment, and now I can laugh at what hilarious fuzzy moccassins I have.

YEH!

DIAMONDS

An exploration of diamonds.



I was talking to this guy one time about how I really liked the one song by Broken Social Scene, Ibi Dreams of Pavement (A Better Day). And he's like, "Oh yeah, that one's great" and then sang a line from that song, and I don't know if he's completely misheard the song or if I misheard him, but I thought he sang, "Diamonds ain't never turning to dust." Even though it's completely wrong and I don't think there is a Broken Social Scene song with that line, it's quite beautiful to me nonetheless. I find that this happens often with Broken Social Scene (like with KC Accidental, I made up alll the lyrics to that song), but I know it's common to mishear songs and you end up with your own version of your lyrics that you grow to love but eventually forget once you learn the correct ones (and you try so hard to remember what you started with, but can never really get back to it).

Anyways.
Nice weather we've been having?

I saw this movie tonight:

A Serious Man. And there were some parts where I had no idea what was going on and why that scene was there and so forth. It was kind of a choppy experience, there's parts where I could understand and I enjoyed, then it would get kind of strange and I had no idea what the director was implying, and then it would go back to understanding, and maybe that was the whole idea of the film, I don't know. But um maybe if you've seen it you could explain the beginning, end, and a bunch of other parts to me?

Hello:

Been busy making things.

Saw my last film today of the VIFF this year, The White Ribbon. In the movie, the daughter and son of the pastor have to wear a thick white ribbon in their hair or arm to remind them of their innocence and purity and to stop them from sinning and whatnot. It seemed like a punishment, a way of identifying that this child did something wrong and needs reminding of what they did wrong, but the ribbon was so beautiful that if I had to wear it, I'd probably just think about how pretty it is and not so much about how I was a bad kid. And apparently I guess the son and daughter were like this as well, but instead of thinking the ribbon was pretty, hrm, thought instead that torturing other kids would be actually pretty fun. You need to see the film to understand what I am saying or prove me totally wrong because I am not entirely sure as to what happened, I was wide awake and everything, even gripping my face at the intense scenes, but there was a lot of implied stuff that I can only guess at and would like to hear what you thought of it because I am not so sure and would really like to know.

Pow Wow

Yeh!
Happy Thanksgiving!

Back to a place where we know we are loved.

This illustration was inspired by this:

The season finale of season 1 of Mad Men, The Wheel. Everything that was said to sell the idea to the client was just so achingly true and things that you know but were never really able to put in such a clear and eloquent way. What was said just resonated with me and nagged at me and I put it to paper.